What U Wanna B?

So my Chargers are still in it...trying not to get to hyped up.

I survive Afghanistan and I survive Iraq, but I come home mentally shattered and can't shake the urge to kill. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/13/us/13vets.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin

My reading has been limited these days. It's a shame I can't sit down to read books anymore...feels to much like law school. Yes, I lost my reading mojo in law school. Damn shame aint it? I get about five pages under my belt and then that's it. I think I will start listening to books on CD, that may work. I really want to check out Barak's last book. Try and see where this cat is coming from. Like I said, I'm undecided.

I'm ready for a road trip. For some reason I enjoy getting on the open road and enjoying the scenery.

A friend was asking the other day, what did I want to be when I was growing up? I actually kind of laughed when the question was posed. I mean, when was the last time I actually thought back on those days you know?

So....don't laugh, no lie, a brotha wanted to be an astronaut. Stop the snickering! I was always intrigued with "Space"...the stars and planets, and the idea of zero gravity. I begged and begged my parents to send me to Summer Space Camp in Huntsville. Sent off for the application and even gave them a well put together presentation. Didn't work though. They had a young negro disappointed. Anyway, I went from wanting to be an astronaut to wanting to be a pilot. My granny started my love of flight by taking me on trips as a child via plane. Planes were the coolest thing to me, and to some extent still are. Once again, I tried to pimp my folks into getting me flying lessons. Instead, they bought me a Flight Simulator game for my computer. As I got older I entertained the idea of joining the military to go to flight school or helicopter training. But those damn recruiters seemed just a little too accommodating. Figured Uncle Sam was trying to pimp me, and have me on some front line somewhere not in a plane, but in a ditch so I passed on that.

It wasn't until I was in about tenth grade and I was reading the Autobiography of Malcolm X did I come across a statement that kind of opened my eyes. Can't remember the exact quote, but something to the fact that the people who help bring change to black people during the struggle were Ministers/Preachers, Doctors, and Lawyers. So I took that statements and marinated on it for a good while. A preacher, me? Naw....I mean I'm spiritual and all but...a religious leader, me? That's too much responsibility for a brotha. Then there was medicine, I didn't even take the time to consider the many fields of medicine, the thought of blood and guts alone took control of that analysis and I moved on. That left law. I could be the cool guy, like Blair Underwood in LA Law (Remember that show?) I thought, I like to read, like to write, like to talk, and love to debate, I might have this law stuff sowed up. Little did I know of the how's, when's and what's that it would take to even get on the right path. I guess I can say, we plan and then God plans.