Then & Now

You know, you never know what is in store for you on any given day, we plan and then as you know God has planned. So as I was getting dressed for work last Monday morning, my mind was on your average work day thoughts. I could not have foreseen that by mid-day, I would be watching a man take his last deep breaths of life.

I have to go back almost nine years, just starting my new job, getting acclimated, learning the ropes. My job then, required me to establish a good trusting relationship with high ranking officials within a certain tight knit department of government. It was my first meeting with one of those high ranking officials. I remember walking in to this individuals office, the smell of fresh cigarette smoke tainting the air, and then seeing this light skin dude with a tight fro sitting behind a desk. I wasn't really nervous, so I strolled on in towards an empty seat and before sitting, introduced myself, advising him who I was with and why I was there. I remember dead silence....and him.....looking at me with beady eyes, kind of like staring me down.....still not saying anything, just looking me up and down. Still waiting for him to say something, he reaches for a cigarette, lights it up, blows out the smoke, then he takes a deep breath and says....Spike...have a seat. By now, I'm thinking this dude crazy. What is he trying to intimidate me? That wouldn't be unusual for his profession. But I go ahead and take my seat. I begin to tell him my angle, why I will be looking for him and his staff's cooperation. The whole time, he's got the beady eye thing going, puffing his cigarette and not saying much, just listening. So I request a file, something I know he's not gonna give me, at least not on the first meeting. That question at least forces him to put the cigarette down. Spike, I can't give you the file, at least not right now. Meaning, he had to call some other folk to find out who the heck this young dude was in his office requesting sensitive material. So with that I get up, and he rises from his desk, still staring me down, extending his hand to offer a handshake to which I too extend my hand. He doesn't walk me out he just stands at his desk, and I make my way on out of his office, closing the door behind me. The meeting to say the least was, uncomfortable and I'm thinking dude is crazy. But there is his secretary, sitting at her desk smiling; I guess she had read my facial expression, so she says........"He does everyone new like that...you've gotta earn his trust."

Needless to say, he and I established a good working relationship, especially when he noticed I had started growing a lil fro. I'd request a file, and he'd deliver. I guess I earned his trust. He was later transferred elsewhere, and we crossed paths very infrequently, when we did, he was very friendly, no beady eyes, no silent stares. Then I left for school, and can't remember the last time we had talked.

Little could I have imagined back then that years later, I would be standing at the foot of his bed, saying a prayer for him as he lived his final hours. It was so eerie to me. I hadn't been on this job more than a month, just as it was years earlier and here I am in front of him again. Who could have imagined that possibility? I just kept thinking how unlikely this event could be? And then he slowly drifted away. RIP MSJ.

So I'm sitting inside of the church for this gentleman's homecoming celebration, or at least that's what they call it. Sitting in a funeral gets your brain to thinking. When my time comes, will I be ready? Some other questions come to mind, some to uncomfortable to type, but it all goes through one's mind. Will anyone be present? Will anyone have anything good to say about you? Not that any of that is important in the big scheme of things. I guess it truly boils down to how you lived your life on this planet and whether you lived a life good enough to bring you success in the hereafter. Gotta lot of work ahead of me. What about you?